Treehouse of AWESOME and other Weekend TV

Was The Simpsons Treehouse of Horror XIX the best one ever? If not, it was damn close.

The intro starts with Homer trying to vote for Obama, which I think is more a reflection on Homer's feelings about old people than any political persuasion.

Sadly, the electronic machine records Homer's vote as for "McCain." Repeated efforts add more and more votes for McCain, in increasing numbers. Finally Homer is sucked into the Voting Machine, yelling out,

"This isn't supposed to happen in America. Maybe Ohio, but not America!"

Truer words, my friend. Truer words.

[Aside: Just now I was at Tv.com to check that I had the segment titles correct, and I noticed that someone gave this episode a 1.0 out of 10. I am not a violent man, but I think if I met this individual on the street I would beat him sharply about the head and shoulders until he saw reason. I'm totally kidding, of course. (I am a violent man.)]

The first segment was a parody of Transformers. known officially as "Untitled Robot Parody." Bart gives Lisa a Malibu Stacy, which is really a transformer. (Much better than what he got her last year, a "box of burps.") The Malibu Stacy Transformer has special powers to make other Tranformers, and one of the funniest parts of the episode were the various "transformer" names. For example, a lamp with a three-level lightbulb is called "Threeway." (and you don't even want to knowwhat the angel on top of the tree was called.)

By the next morning the whole house is Transformered up, but so far only Maggie has noticed. Homer starts to get suspicious, but the Toaster tells him it's all okay, and as Homer puts it, "The toaster has never lied to me before." (Which is interesting, since in past Simpsons, the toaster has made fun of Homer, and it also sent him back in time. It's also worth pointing out that I have a friend who once thought the toaster was trying to kill her. Maybe she had a transformer toaster?)

Eventually most of Springfield is destroyed but Marge talks the main two transformers out of conflict. Peace settled, they team up to enslave the human race, which ends up with all of Sprinfield in a human foosball table. Usually one segment is lesser than the others, and I guess you would have to say this was the weak one, but it was damn funny, and would belong in any Treehouse of Horror.


Segment two was "How to Get ahead in Dead-vertising," and was the strongest of the three. It starts with a Mad Men opening, and then has Homer getting mad at Krusty and accidentally killing him in a woodchipper. (When the heart flies out of the chipper intact Homer tries to give it CPR.) Because of his talent for killing celebrities, Homer is hired by an Ad firm to kill more celebrities, with the idea that once they are dead, their likeness can be used in commercials. (A la those horrific Fred Astaire commercials.)

Homer agrees to do this, and in short order has killed George Clooney, Prince, and Neil Armstrong. (And Kate Winslett, which sadly, we don't see.) Up in "Celebrity Heaven," all the celebrities are pissed that their likenesses are being used. (George Washington is furious that he's in a commercial kissing Lincoln. For his part, Lincoln seems particularly less angry.)

Anyway, John Wayne, Krusty and Washington lead a revolt out of Heaven, and there's hell to pay! I can't describe how funny this is. One of the best parts shows Edward G. Robinson giving Chief Wiggum (who always sounds exactly like Robinson.)

Homer eventually is killed and makes it up to Heaven, where he locks the celebrities out. (Lincoln welcomes him happily, which Homer may not take to. Or maybe he will.) But before he dies, Homer asks Krusty what the "one true religion" is. Krusty replies that it's a "mixture of voodoo and Methodist."

I guess that settles it: God is Catholic.



In segment three The Simpsons go for broke, taking on the icon of Halloween specials in "It's a Grand Pumpkin, Milhouse." So many great things about this episode, including Marge playing a trombone with that wa-wa thing you put at the end to make her sound like an adult in a Charlie Brown special. Oh, and Ralph was Pig-Pen!

Anyway, Milhouse has faith that the Grand Pumpkin will appear. As he puts it:

"I believe in the Grand Pumpkin, almighty gourd, who was crustified over Pontius pie plate and ascended into oven. He will come again to judge the filling and the bread."

Dude: that's just awesome.

Milhouse's tears bring the Grand Pumpkin to life, which is great until Milhouse gives him some Pumpkin Bread. When the Grand Pumpkin finds out it isn't "bread made for pumpkins to eat" but is actually made OF pumpkin, he goes on a revenge killing spree. (When Willie offers The Grand Pumpkin some pumpkin seeds, the Jack-O-Lantern roars, "Why would you roast our young?")

Eventually Lisa talks Milhouse into believing in "Tom Turkey," who shows up and kills the Grand Pumpkin. Milhouse if overjoyed, and invites Tom Turkey to Thanksgiving Dinner, where he will get turkey. This starts the whole cyle of revenge over again.

My words do not do this segment justice. I left out the whole part about the Pumpkin being racist, and Nelson acting like Martin Luther King. You have to see it to believe it. I left out the Red Baron and Kodos and Kang and....so much.

YOU MUST WATCH THIS EPISODE!!!!!

Whatever you have to do, watch it. Should be on IMDB.com and hulu.com and the like. You really have to see it.

Family Guy " Baby Not on Board"

A rather pedestrian Family Guy, which was to be expected after the high of The Simpsons. Still, I expected more. The whole "Stewie Home Alone" angle seemed stupid, particularly since Stewie's character is pretty damn independent. I mean, didn't he travel through time in a time machine he created a couple of weeks ago? And didn't he take over America last year? And now we're supposed to just buy him as a scared infant? Not me.


Funny Lines: I didn't really watch KING OF THE HILL or AMERICAN DAD, but I did manage to overhear two great lines.

At the end of the King of the Hill credits they always repeat a line from the show, and this time it was:

"Who wants to get kicked in the ding-dong?"

I have no idea the circumstances, but that's funny. Use it: on me.

On American Dad, Stan and Roger (the alien) were flying over Montana. It led to this exchange:

Stan: the closest thing to a town around here is my ass!
Roger: Yeah, and that's a hole.


That's good stuff.

Oh, and I saw Korgoth on Friday night. Thanks to Rennratt for introducing me. And did anyone see the Texas/Texas Tech game Saturday Night? To die for.

Which leads me to McCain! He was on Saturday Night Live, and really hilarious! But, I'm going to lose the computer in a few minutes, so more on that another time.