America's Got Talent Tuesday edition-- The Fan Girl review by Alexis-Rueal

This is it: the final week of auditions for America's Got Talent, and we're in Chicago to see who has what it takes to possibly make it to Vegas. Tonight, I am only going to talk about one bad act. It is the only one that truly warrants attention, and only because of Howie.

We start off tonight with a young man named Zach Cardy, who comes to Chicago touring what he calls a "unique and disgusting act"... sneezing with his eyes open. He sticks a q-tip up his nose (Honestly, I can't make this shit up.), and forces himself to sneeze with his eyes open.

Zach gets to the stage and the judges ask him about his act. Once he explains, Howie pretty much goes bat-shit crazy and gives the boy a pre-X before walking off. Poor Howie, you gotta keep your therapist close by when on this show, my friend.

Zach, who seems to have no self-respect whatsoever, sticks the q-tip up his nose and tries to force some sneezes. Howie is encouraging the audience to give the X and turn their backs on Zach. He is actually rather pissed at Zach. He even goes up and presses Sharon's buzzer. Oh, as an aside... Zach couldn't make himself sneeze. And he was doing some major digging, too. Oh, well... you win some, you lose some.

Howie pretty much verbally bitch slapped Zach off the stage on behalf of all the judges. I think he would have kicked Zach's ass if he weren't so scared of catchin' his cooties.

The first really good act of the evening was the dance group the Strikers All Stars. This is a dance/step group that stemmed from the FAMU Strikers out of Florida A&M University. They had previously performed on America's Best Dance Crew, and came to AGT to continue in their quest for success.

Let me just say: These gentlemen are GOOD. Damn Good. They pulled some stunts that were absolutely amazing. And these guys are BUILT. The women are going to LOVE them!!!! (fan girls, get ready for it)

Sharon thought these gentlemen were very good. Howie disagreed, saying they were great. Piers was quite taken with them as well. These young men get a 3 yes pass and are on their way to Vegas. Here's hoping they go far.

Ok. I will say this now: We have out Susan Boyle for this season and HIS name is Carlos Aponte, from Puerto Rico. First, he's a cutie... my little fan girly self blushed when I saw him. I actually think I said, "Aw" once. He's a little guy, with an absolutely boyish charm about him. I really didn't care if he had talent-- I was happy gazing. But he did have a talent to share. He sings; and boy did he!

No one knew such a big voice was going to come out of such a small guy. He sang an operatic tune (I honestly could not get the name, but I tried), and he brought the house down. The judges were amazed-- Piers said that gave him goosebumps and then asked Carlos if he knew what that meant. Carlos said no, but he understood enough to know it was a good thing.

Howie said that as a judge, he wanted to be a part of an "unexpected, fantastic, moment," and that with Carlos, he got it.

The judges gave Carlos three yes's. What was cute, though, is that Carlos was so thunderstruck he wouldn't leave the stage. Nick had to go out there to help guide Carlos off stage. Carlos waived him off... and the judges asked if he wanted to say anything else. Carlos ended with a "thank you." Too damn cute. I can't wait to see more that hot little feller!

Also on tonight's episode, a strongman namedJohn Beatty. He is a 43 year old Registered Nurse. He came with all sorts of kick-ass strong man feats. He started off with rolling a frying pan up like a burrito. Yeah. He did. As he was performing, Nick was backstage double-dog daring Piers to buzz John. Well, Piers did not disappoint. What the hell, Piers? Knickers in a twist?

John performs some other nifty tricks, like, oh, hammering a nail through a license plate AND wood WITH HIS BARE HAND . Then we get John bending a large nail while holding onto a 300 lb stone ball. That dude could crush a skull with one hand. DO NOT MAKE HIM MAD!

As to the judges, two out of three were really impressed with John. Leave it to Prissy Piers to come up with some inane statement like the frying pan was weak material. Howie, always willing to put Piers in his place, retrieved said frying pan and pretty much called Piers a girl and told him to unroll the frying pan. Gotta give it to Piers, he tried. He tried and I laughed my ass off... along with everyone else in America. Piers got served by a nuuurse! Piers got served by a nuuurse! Piers admitted the error of his ways (although begrudgingly), and John got his three yes's.

To end this evening, we had a cute little 21 year old college student and waitress, Debra Romer. She is a former foster child who had run away from home at 17 and never looked back. She had her music, though, and a determined attitude. She was nervous, never performed on this big of a stage before; and she sang "Arms of the Angel" by Sarah McLaughlin.

This girl has a lovely voice-- sweet and tender and innocent. I think Sarah Mac would like Debra. The audience adores this girl, but two out of three judges are a little conflicted about her. Howie and Sharon feel that the stage overwhelms her and affects her presence. Piers, who makes up for his idiocy with John Beatty, says that she is filled with an innocence and vulnerability. Howie votes no for Deborah, though he does like her singing. Piers says yes, and Sharon (with some MAJOR influence by the audience) decides to give her another chance. Debra goes to Vegas, and we are all pretty damn pleased.

So, all in all, a very entertaining night for America's Got Talent. I'll be back tomorrow with more.

Til Then!
(fan-girl confessor)